How to deal with Bullying and Self Defence at School

Bullying in schools is an issue that concerns many parents and understandably raises difficult questions around self defence, confidence and personal safety. 

One of the biggest areas of confusion is understanding what a child should do if bullying becomes physical and they feel they need to defend themselves.

At Shin Gi Tai Martial Arts Academy Winchester, we believe that good self protection is always about awareness, confidence and avoiding conflict wherever possible. Physical self defence should only ever be a genuine last resort when there is no safe alternative.

What Is Bullying?

There is no single legal definition of bullying, but it is generally understood to be behaviour that is:

• Repeated over time
• Intended to hurt, intimidate or distress another person
• Physical, emotional, verbal or psychological in nature

Bullying can take many forms, including:

• Physical aggression or assault
• Name calling and verbal abuse
• Social exclusion or intimidation
• Threats and harassment
• Online abuse or cyberbullying

Cyberbullying has become an increasingly serious issue for schools and parents alike. The introduction of the Online Safety Act 2023 places stricter responsibilities on online platforms to remove illegal harmful content, but despite this, online bullying remains a major challenge affecting many young people.

When Bullying Becomes A Criminal Matter

While schools will usually deal with most bullying incidents internally, some behaviours can cross the line into criminal offences.

In serious cases, the police and Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) can become involved. Examples may include:

Harassment

Under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997, repeated behaviour that causes alarm or distress may constitute harassment.

Malicious Communications

Sending threatening, abusive or grossly offensive messages online, by text or through social media may amount to offences under the Malicious Communications Act 1988 and related legislation.

Assault and Violence

Physical bullying may be treated as common assault, Actual Bodily Harm (ABH) or Grievous Bodily Harm (GBH), depending on the seriousness of the injuries caused.

Hate Crime

Bullying motivated by hostility towards race, religion, disability, sexual orientation or transgender identity is treated particularly seriously and may be prosecuted as an aggravated offence.

Public Order Offences

Threatening, abusive or insulting behaviour intended to cause harassment, alarm or distress may also amount to criminal conduct.

Schools and Their Responsibilities

All state schools are legally required to have an anti-bullying and behaviour policy in place.

Schools should clearly explain:

• How bullying incidents are reported
• How investigations are handled
• What support is available for pupils
• What disciplinary procedures may follow

Parents should always request a copy of the school’s anti-bullying policy if concerns arise.

Self Defence and The Law

Parents often ask:

“Does my child have the right to defend themselves?”

Under UK law, a person may use reasonable force to protect themselves or another person if they are genuinely under attack.

However, there is an important difference between self defence and retaliation.

At Shin Gi Tai Martial Arts Academy Winchester, children are taught:

• Avoid conflict where possible
• Stay calm under pressure
• Escape danger if they can
• Use physical force only if genuinely necessary for safety

Many school behaviour policies refer to “not retaliating aggressively,” which is understandable in principle. However, real-life situations are not always simple, particularly where a child is being physically harmed.

This is why it is important for parents to discuss these situations openly with their children and decide together what they believe is appropriate if a physical assault occurs.

Helping Your Child Deal With Bullying

There are several practical steps that can help children manage bullying situations more effectively.

Stay Around Friends

Bullies are often less likely to target children who are surrounded by supportive friends or trusted adults.

Avoid Escalation

Walking away, refusing to react emotionally and staying calm can sometimes remove the reaction a bully is seeking.

Build Confidence

Confident body language, eye contact and assertive communication can make a child appear far less vulnerable.

Keep A Record

If bullying is ongoing, keeping a written record of incidents, dates and locations can help schools investigate patterns of behaviour more effectively.

Tell A Trusted Adult

Children should never feel they must handle bullying alone. Parents, teachers and school staff need to know what is happening.

Supporting Your Child Emotionally

Bullying can seriously affect confidence, self-esteem and emotional wellbeing.

Parents can help by:

• Reassuring children that the bullying is not their fault
• Focusing on their strengths and achievements
• Encouraging positive friendships and hobbies
• Creating calm, supportive conversations at home

Martial Arts training can often play a very positive role in helping children rebuild confidence, resilience and emotional control.

At Shin Gi Tai Martial Arts Academy Winchester, we regularly see shy or anxious children grow into calmer, more confident young people through structured Martial Arts training and supportive coaching.

Working With The School

If bullying is happening at school, it is important to approach the situation calmly and constructively.

Helpful steps include:

• Informing the school as early as possible
• Arranging meetings with relevant staff
• Bringing records of incidents if available
• Understanding the school’s anti-bullying procedures
• Working together to improve the situation rather than simply assigning blame

Most importantly, children need to feel that the adults around them are listening, supporting them and taking the issue seriously.

Ultimately, the goal of self protection is not fighting.
It is helping children become safer, more aware, more resilient and more confident in dealing with difficult situations throughout life.